This woman is trouble

was in an absolute foul mood last nite. started good enough, and i went to bed pretending to be asleep for an hour and a half. then i opened my eyes for another hour, before drifting into what i thought was a fitful sleep. eventhough i still woke up fuming. and i don't really know why. i am well and truly bored with all things in life at the moment. so this is what it feels like to have no direction, nothing to strive for. which makes me wonder, why am i so uncomfortable in my own skin, that i can't just lie still and be me?
work has been fairly exciting so far. came out of a very constructive meeting with a client who's a real estate developer, and i can feel the motions of my brain picking up a gear. and we are moving offices next month!!! finally, it only took 6 months to um and ahhh about it - eventhough we'd known about it for 1.5 years. ohmygod! and i get a window seat with a balcony to walk out onto!! yes, i can already picture how 'my' room is going to look and feel.
back to the grind for me.

Monotony has finally set in

the days from anywhere between october to december are always blurry and kinda dream-like. the weather is warming slowly, though hitting us with even streams of cool-er days. i can't wait for summer. i met my beloved in summer - it is kinda my favourite time of the year now. when everything kinda moves at hyper speed (maybe it's linear with the amount of alcohol consumed), there are christmas parties and new year parties to wear pretty frocks to.
ended up sleeping at home last night because there was no shower to be had in the other apartment (my beloved's). it's quite nice to be back home, although i've been flitting between households for like forever now. definitely doesn't strike the stable nature in me, in whatsoever way. nah-uh. several friends are getting married soon. i feel really excited and ecstatic for them, and i get to go to church weddings again and bawl my eyes out. stoopid! so this time i am prepared. lots of tissues and water-proof mascara.
other than that, work is chockers at the moment, but i can't seem to find that motivation. it's been too long, at the same place, doing the same thing. something's gotta give, no? it is only human nature to evolve and get on to bigger and better things.
recently observed - i love it when it rains and then there is bright sunshine after that. it makes everything glimmer and shine. i might have been a cat in my past life - attracted to glittery things! :)
am thinking of packing up and calling it a day. nothing more to look forward to than to go home and lie on the couch with the remote in hand. ciao!